As Coaches, Are We Just Another Dear Abby for Our Students?

When I was first hired to be a college life coach, I thought I was starting my coaching career with a good understanding of how to coach a student. Since elementary school, my friends and family have playfully referred to me as “Dear Abby,” and so it is no wonder that I have ended up working in various advising-type roles throughout my higher education career. If “Dear Abby” is unfamiliar to you, it’s the name of one of the most widely read and long-standing advice columns in the world and is well known for, “sound, compassionate advice, delivered with the straightforward style of a good friend.” Yep. Listening to friends’ cares and concerns and offering them advice – that’s me in a nutshell.  And, naively, after being hired for that first coaching job, that’s what I thought I was being hired to do.

So, if coaching isn’t about giving advice, what is it? And what makes it different than counseling or academic advising? In this section, you will learn a brief history of coaching and its entry into higher education, what makes coaching unique from other similar student services, and the fundamental beliefs upon which coaching is based.

A Brief History to Give Some Context

Today, a variety of programs and coaching models can be easily found by doing a quick Google search but, back in the 1990s and early 2000s, coaching was just starting to be introduced on college campuses. The popularity of coaching in higher education gained momentum after the business sector experienced success with coaching. New theories and models for organizational change, such as Appreciative Inquiry, Cognitive Behavioral Coaching, and Positive Psychology, caused a shift in the field of change management from a deficit-based theory of change to a positive, life-centric theory. This paradigm shift led the way for a surge of leadership and personal development practices (such as coaching) to be integrated into corporate America. Studies showed that coaching helped employees become more self-confident, better problem solvers, and generally happier at their jobs. The education sector began implementing coaching services with hopes of similar outcomes for students and increased retention and graduation rates. Happily, the data show conclusively that coaching in higher education can positively impact student achievement in terms of student persistence, student retention, and degree completion. The rest, as they say, is history.

So, What Is Coaching?

Coaching is a developmental process that is useful in advancing our students’ skills, abilities, and behaviors and in boosting academic performance. Together, we work with our students to help them achieve personal or professional goals that move them forward toward graduation and beyond.

Core Beliefs of Coaching – Let’s Break it Down

• Students are the experts on their lives

Every student has their own story and knows themselves better than anyone else. Coaches recognize that and encourage students to take the lead in their journey, sharing their thoughts and feelings. Coaches facilitate conversations that help students explore their goals, aspirations, and challenges, ultimately making them feel more in control of their learning.

• Coaching empowers students to become independent, self-regulated learners

The main goal of coaching is to equip students with the tools they need to navigate college and to help them learn how to stand on their own two feet. Through coaching, students learn skills like setting goals, reflecting on their progress, and managing their time. This, in turn, helps students build confidence and independence, preparing them for success beyond the classroom.

• Coaching is a collaboration between the coach and the student

Coaching isn’t a one-sided approach where the coach tells the students what to do; it’s a partnership.  Coaches support and guide while students share their ideas and experiences. Together, they create a relaxed space where they can brainstorm, solve problems, and generate personalized strategies that work for the student.

• Coaching focuses on students’ strengths, possibilities, and growth

Instead of focusing on what’s wrong or what needs fixing, coaching shines a light on what students are good at and what they can achieve. By celebrating their strengths, coaches help students dream big and see all the possibilities ahead. This strengths-based approach boosts confidence and motivates them to continue growing and improving, fostering resilience and a growth mindset.

How Is Coaching Different from academic Advising, Counseling, or Mentoring?

A common and valid question for those unfamiliar with coaching is, “What is the difference between coaching and ________?” Fill in the blank with any of the following: advising, counseling, or mentoring. All these roles can be considered student support roles that help improve the student experience and retention rates. They are all unique, however, in that they all have different approaches.

Review

So, are academic coaches just today’s version of Dear Abby? Not really. While we offer guidance and support, our role is way more nuanced and strategic. We’re all about helping students become more independent and grow. Our students have the power to find their own solutions; sometimes, they just get stuck in their habits, thoughts, and beliefs. Through coaching, we help them notice how they’re thinking, their self-talk, and those blind spots they might not even realize they have. Once they gain a clearer view and step outside their usual mindset, they can open up their thinking and take new actions. So, while Dear Abby might lend a friendly ear and dish out practical advice, academic coaches focus on helping students confidently navigate their own paths—that’s a small but significant difference that really changes the game when it comes to student support.

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